Because why not go all out? Find it here.
1. What makes you feel powerful? Being able to sit at the pool, a restaurant, a ball game, with a smile on my face all by myself and feeling completely, 100% comfortable and fine and happy. Not that I don’t ever need anyone or that I’m a complete badass 100% of the time, because I’m not, and I’m incredibly fond of people (some…people), but just for that little bit I can just be myself.
2. What makes you feel calm? A thunderstorm, because at least for a second, my head and my thoughts and my feelings are less crazy than what’s going on out there. And also a night time drive when the lights are synced and you hit all green lights and there aren’t too many other people out on the road.
3. What makes you feel in control? When the world goes exactly as I planned it…which is, to say, never. But I feel in control when something goes wrong and I can laugh about it, or accept it, or let it sit with me.
4. How do you encourage yourself when you’re trying something new? I tell myself that I cannot properly live by my own moral code if I say I don’t like something but have never tried it before. Also, I like learning new things and embracing the moments when I really suck so that I can get a lot better.
5. What’s a choice you can make this week based on your needs? I can remember that my wants and needs are probably very different, and that I can set boundaries for myself, and that I SHOULD do that when I need it.
6. How do you shift your mindset if it isn’t working for you? I don’t really know what this means. But I guess I sit and decide if I want to shift my mindset — is it worth it, does it align with my values?
7. How do you recharge? I recharge by sitting in the sun and being in water, and when I’m really wired up, I go for a run. Most people think that recharging is becoming more energized, but to me, it means calming down, removing some of the negative energy from my head, and restarting.
8. How can you celebrate yourself today? I celebrate myself each day by finding something to be proud of, even in the smallest of ways. Even if it’s something like getting out of my own head and getting out of my apartment for a few minutes or hours.
9. What does your situational best look like today? I guess this means making the best out of what you have. And thankfully, lately nothing has thrown a wrench in my plans, but I really want to start thinking of things in this framework — where you can only do as much as you can.
10. What helps you slow down and feel more present? I think just focusing on the exact moment and what I’m doing is helpful — telling myself that I’m staring at a cloud, taking a deep breath in, letting a breath out. For the times that I feel like I’m being crushed, that’s all you can do.
11. What can you do today that you didn’t think you could do a year ago? I can sort of do a clean and a snatch! At the very least, I’m learning how to do that, I’m learning how to shoot a gun better, how to budget more properly, and how to be by myself again.
12. What’s a goal you want to accomplish and why? I want to be able to squat my bodyweight without pain. Not because it matters how much I can squat, but because I want to be able to do it pain-free and show myself that I can do the hard things that I want to do.
13. How do you put yourself first without feeling guilty? I think I put myself in other peoples’ shoes to see it from their point of view and see if it’s a respectable or logical decision. Of course, it doesn’t mean that I make the correct decision after I think it through, but…that’s another story.
14. How do you practice self-acceptance? I’ve finally been able to accept that I’m a bit of an odd duck. I do weird things, I’ll get weird looks, and people will always ask me why I do something and laugh — I just explain it, laugh with them, and then move on.
15. How do you stay focused and steer clear of distractions? I usually have to find music without words in it to stay focused, but I’ve honestly been incredibly terrible at this. So I don’t know. I just need to stop and challenge myself to actually do this.
16. How do you trust yourself to make big decisions? Ha. That’s funny. Adulthood is actually just a lot of guessing and hoping you chose the right thing, then adjusting depending on what you chose. So that’s how I trust myself — I trust myself to know that I can always figure it out no matter what happens.
17. How do you set boundaries and avoid absorbing someone else’s emotions and stress? This is a great question because I haven’t had to do this in awhile. But I often want to help people so I like to talk with them through things. I have so many emotions as it is, it actually really helps to step out of my own head for a little bit.
18. How do you savor the time you get alone? I hate this question because I’ve been spending way too much time alone with quarantine! So this is not a great question for the time that we’re currently in…ha.
19. How do you notice when you’re nearing burnout? I notice it when I have my hallmark signs of anxiety and when I’m doing 800 things a day — because I have some signs of anxiety right now but I’m not doing a lot. I’m almost burnt out by not doing anything. Anyway, I get really irritated, get overwhelmed by all the things I need to do and end up doing practically nothing, and a few other things I simply can’t think of right now because it’s been so long.
20. How do you share your feelings with the people who care about you? I just tell them. I don’t really hide anything, some might even say that I overshare. I also am really picky with the people I trust my full emotions with, but most of that stuff is just out there.
21. How do you swap envy for joy when other people accomplish things? I just tell myself that I get to make my own path and then I decide that I’m going to be happy for someone else being able to achieve what they want — even if it’s exactly what I want and they got there first — so what? In a few weeks or months years, maybe I won’t even want the same thing.
22. How do you advocate for yourself? I don’t really know if I have? But I think I advocate for myself by being honest about myself and saying that I’m able to grow and learn from my mistakes — and just being myself because that’s really important to me.
23. How do you forgive yourself when you make a mistake? I just tell myself to do better the next time. That’s my usual thing to do because it isn’t necessarily forgiveness, but it’s an acceptance of doing something wrong and then making the moves to do it differently and better the next time.
24. How do you ask for help or support when you need it? I just do. I’ve never been good at shoving away my emotions, which has both positives and negatives, but also — I think I need to work on expanding my network and learning how to ask for support from different people in order to build friendships.
25. How do you practice self-love and self-kindness? This. I like to write stuff and think about where I am and who I am, where I’ve been, where I’m going. It reminds me of my purpose, the things I’ve accomplished, my failures and my subsequent lessons, and makes everything feel ok in that very moment.
26. How do you calm your nerves in a difficult situation? I try deep breaths, I try to squeeze my hands together, I then sometimes start blabbering on about stuff before I’m ready, so…I should probably quit that. But sometimes it doesn’t work and sometimes I struggle.
27. How do you make the time you spend with people more intentional? I have a big habit of putting phones down and just having conversations, and maybe, yeah, taking some breaks to respond to other friends or just see what’s going on in the world. And in the same way I try not to network by asking dumb questions that I already have the answers to…I want the time to be meaningful. I have friends who I talk to everyday, I have friends I talk to once a month. I enjoy talking consistently to people but I can’t really force some more reclusive friends to chat more. So here we are.
28. How do you embrace your authentic self, even if it looks different from what others expect? I just remind myself that my emotions are valid. My actions, however, can’t always be based on my emotions. When I remind myself that feelings are not facts, but just some really great information, everything makes sense to me. I know that I’m carrying myself the way I want to when I do that.
29. How do you set and protect your boundaries? I think I just do. I usually have to talk to my friends about what my boundaries with other people are because they really help me since they know me at face value, which is still a lot — and not all the little intricacies inside my head. You don’t have to do everything yourself, ya know?
30. What new opportunities have come out of challenges you’ve faced? I would never have gone to the exact grad school I went to and met the amazing people I did — and I never would have lived in my favorite state to date. I can’t imagine my life without having gone through what I have.
31. How can you step outside your comfort zone to grow? I just do it. And then I learn every single day that I am strong enough to take yet another step outside of that comfort zone! And it’s incredibly surprising and weird.
32. How do you remind yourself that you’re enough? I don’t ever think about this. Is it about being enough for someone else? For myself? Just by writing these things I remind myself that I am enough for myself. And then I know that I will always find people in my life who think I am enough — that’s why they’re there for me.
I think this thing taught me that some of these questions are pretty easily answered. But I could definitely spend time being much more mindful of what I’m doing, how it makes me feel, and what I can do better.
