Recently I’ve been wrestling with asking for help when I need it and learning to rely on others because of everything that’s been going on at work. It’s been a really great semester and I want to reflect on it, even though it hasn’t fully been completed yet and I still have about 3–4 projects to complete.
I’ve spent the last 5 weeks and 2 days working on a grant I found out about on 11/8/22. That marks the day that my life essentially imploded & also got much, much better. I also initially thought it was due 11/30/22, and it luckily got extended to 12/31…and I think it’s the universe’s way of telling me that things are going to work out, even if I don’t get the grant. It has been a whirlwind, but it’s required me to ask people to help me with a lot of things. Which has been really, really, hard, as someone who hates to ask people for help.
It also required me to ask really important people at the university a lot of things. I mean, my advisor & the faculty members here are very productive & busy, and sometimes it almost feels wrong for “little old me” to poke them for help. It’s still surreal that I get to be here doing research in a really cool lab with some amazing faculty members & fellow graduate students. But there is definitely a bit of guilt, almost, in me asking for help — my parents raised us to be very hard-working, efficient, and…